Elections season in Israel is so fun.
We're still a couple weeks away from actual voting, and we've already had the Shas party called out - again - for illegal pre-elections blessings (Americans, did you know that was a thing? It is here!). At the last count, five of the outgoing Knesset's factions have had at least one MK split off to form their own party, and that's not even counting Atzmaut or anything else from over a year ago. And of course Livni is attacking Bibi, Bibi is attacking Bennett, and Yair Lapid might be attacking someone too - we'll see when he finally makes his point.
What I'm saying is, I have Elections Bingo already. I am happy.
But then! There is more! The universe truly loves me this elections season.
There is: Michael Ben-Ari and Aryeh Eldad appealing to the Arab vote.
There is Meretz's terrible, terrible campaign jingle (Meretz, you probably started well, but you forgot to wait long enough to let the creativity-inspiring high fade so you could review this while sober).
And of course, there's this (for those who don't recognize it, that's Israel's national anthem. With a slightly different tune).
But! I've saved the best for last.
The best remains the Unofficial Naftali Bennett Facebook page, still solidly in the lead. This page exists to reveal some of Bennett's lesser-known traits to the public. Such as:
- When Naftali Bennett plays paper, he beats scissors.
- Naftali Bennett threw one grenade and killed 80 terrorists. And then the grenade exploded.
- Naftali Bennett doesn't pass on chain mail, and nothing happens to him.
- When Naftali Bennett goes to a restaurant, the waiter leaves him a tip.
- When Naftali Bennett takes the Jews out of Egypt, he still has time to bake the bread.
So much elections fun.
Fortunately, the fun doesn't have to end when the elections do. Last time elections were barely over when we had accusations of incitement to murder to deal with.
Politics. It's like Jerry Springer, but when the show's over, instead of going back to their private lives in a run-down rural town somewhere, they go run the country. I try to ignore that last part.
We're still a couple weeks away from actual voting, and we've already had the Shas party called out - again - for illegal pre-elections blessings (Americans, did you know that was a thing? It is here!). At the last count, five of the outgoing Knesset's factions have had at least one MK split off to form their own party, and that's not even counting Atzmaut or anything else from over a year ago. And of course Livni is attacking Bibi, Bibi is attacking Bennett, and Yair Lapid might be attacking someone too - we'll see when he finally makes his point.
What I'm saying is, I have Elections Bingo already. I am happy.
But then! There is more! The universe truly loves me this elections season.
There is: Michael Ben-Ari and Aryeh Eldad appealing to the Arab vote.
There is Meretz's terrible, terrible campaign jingle (Meretz, you probably started well, but you forgot to wait long enough to let the creativity-inspiring high fade so you could review this while sober).
And of course, there's this (for those who don't recognize it, that's Israel's national anthem. With a slightly different tune).
But! I've saved the best for last.
The best remains the Unofficial Naftali Bennett Facebook page, still solidly in the lead. This page exists to reveal some of Bennett's lesser-known traits to the public. Such as:
- When Naftali Bennett plays paper, he beats scissors.
- Naftali Bennett threw one grenade and killed 80 terrorists. And then the grenade exploded.
- Naftali Bennett doesn't pass on chain mail, and nothing happens to him.
- When Naftali Bennett goes to a restaurant, the waiter leaves him a tip.
- When Naftali Bennett takes the Jews out of Egypt, he still has time to bake the bread.
So much elections fun.
Fortunately, the fun doesn't have to end when the elections do. Last time elections were barely over when we had accusations of incitement to murder to deal with.
Politics. It's like Jerry Springer, but when the show's over, instead of going back to their private lives in a run-down rural town somewhere, they go run the country. I try to ignore that last part.
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